This could be the beginning of something EPIC.

Hello.

I find one of the most astonishing things about modern society is that we have technology which allows us to keep record of everything, yet... we lose so much. I find that it's difficult to remember things that happen. Am I getting old? Senile? Or just victim to the fact that I don't have a constant recording device watching me eternally? Perhaps that's not so far off? I mean, everyone is into Facebook and blogging, and knowing everything about everything and everyone... but no one can even use the words YOUR and YOU'RE correctly. People are dependent on technology, yet they take it for granted. The internet is a powerful tool. But in the hands of fools, it is exploited and even wasted. I have strong opinions. I have an ability to type at a decent pace. I spend time each day at my computer. Therefore, I think that I am eligible to have a blog. Maybe this is one of those things that will soon be forgotten, but I'm hoping not. I am also hoping to be able to voice opinions to the public that won't get me shunned or hated by anyone who happens to be reading. I want to be able to keep my memories saved somewhere, so that I can go back and laugh at myself for whatever I did. My mother used the phrase "Hindsight is 20/20" today... referring to... I cannot recall, actually, but it's very true. I think that I will look back on this someday and laugh at myself, but I think it will at very least give me a vision as to what I was thinking, who I was, and how far I have come as a person. There will be goals, dreams, thoughts, opinions, rants... it will be all about dealing with life, and what it seems to throw at me. I have been through a bit so far. Life, love, work, work, work, some more love, and some more life. And what else is there? Life is about spending. We make money. We spend it. We make time. We spend it. We have to budget time and money. Time towards making money, time towards people, money towards time? Money towards people? Ok. This blog will likely not make further reference to prostitution. But it is all about living life for those that you love. Whatever you believe about our existence on earth, it is certain that we are only here for a short time. In that time it is important that we make some sort of impact. I often see young people today that don't seem to care to make an impact. This saddens me more than the lack of a decent font on this blog program. (I mean, Arial is ok... but it will only get you so far!) But back to making a difference... It seems like there are few people in our generation that are prepared to do that. I can't really say I've made much of a difference with my life. So far I am at a stand-still. I am waiting for my chance to do something. I am a student. I want to learn everything. I want to have the knowledge. I think I have more ambition than intelligence. But I like it that way. I have a bit of intelligence. Enough to get me by in design school, I guess. Not enough for Engineering, however, that could be attributed to a lack of maturity at the time.

Life passes by so quickly that we can't seem to save enough of it. Recent years have blown by, and I can't help but feel like I am left with nothing. Does it sometimes feel like we have nothing? Perhaps it gets better with a family and a mortgage, etc. Maybe that puts things into perspective, puts you into your "place" in the world. Do we have a place, though? Are we meant for a specific task? No. I don't think so. We are put on this earth with different skills, abilities, and initial differentials. But our experiences ultimately determine where we fit. Things change. People change. We change with everything else around us. It is an exciting change, and yet... frightening at times, and hurtful. Sometimes we want to hold onto things the way that they are. Sometimes we just get scared of moving on. It's time to live life. And sometimes you just have to keep on truckin', as they say. Life can only move forward. Sometimes we have things from the past that come back, but they become new items with different qualities. Time doesn't stop or stand still or pause. It is a perpetual motion machine of the ages. It ticks away our lifeblood and has no sympathy, nor remorse.

I am young. There is much life that is ripe for the picking. So it's important to seize what you can. It's important to keep going when things are hard... get through to live to another better day. When it comes down to it, friends are irreplaceable, but friends fall and fail, and move apart. People grow apart. Remember all the people you used to talk to when you were younger? Why did you lose touch? We have crazy new technology that is so simply bringing people together (cough... facebook...cough) Yet, I still feel as though I don't know anyone anymore. Maybe it's just me? Maybe I have been isolating due to my ambitions to try to learn everything. Maybe it is dedication to other facets of life that cost us everything in our social lives. As an Environmental Design student, I know that I am part of an extreme breed of... machines? Well, if the fuel is coffee and nachos... then a robot is me. (the coffee comment is actually only applicable to Dan, but I enjoy a large plate of nachos 2-3 times per week during finals)

I think that I need to take a break from philosophical ranting. The point here is that there is more to life than we can ever imagine. There is too much to take in, too much to remember, and it's extremely difficult to know what is right and what is wrong all of the time. I think the important part is being able to say that you did the best you could, considering the situation. Just.... try. That's all you can do... and sometimes we don't. Sometimes we don't try to be the best people we can be. But we should. It's not as simple as that, but that's a big part.

I think we are all searching for the answers. The unfortunate thing about life is that they are different for everyone, so when your friend finds them, he can't just write them on a cheat sheet for you. Your answers may come much further into life. And you always live with the knowledge that, the only thing certain is that you will never be certain.

The world is a billion shades of gray.

Goodnight World.

Shawn.